it’s early
the sky barely greying
into Monday’s dawn
I watch you sleeping
dark lashes splayed on faded circles
painted beneath your eyes
by the dreams you won’t speak of
that you wrestle every night
sleepless
11 Jun 2013 7 Comments
in poetry
a few words spewing from my soul…
11 Jun 2013 7 Comments
in poetry
it’s early
the sky barely greying
into Monday’s dawn
I watch you sleeping
dark lashes splayed on faded circles
painted beneath your eyes
by the dreams you won’t speak of
that you wrestle every night
Jun 11, 2013 @ 10:55:06
Hope you don’t mind me mentioning that you need “it’s” rather than “it’s”. 🙂
janet
Jun 11, 2013 @ 12:17:02
Lol – hmmm it’s /)
🙂 not at all – my phone loves to auto-incorrect all the time. And I’m not quite to the point of bifocals, but I’m getting close.
Jun 11, 2013 @ 12:32:28
My iPad auto-corrects, too, often to bad effect. As for bifocals, I have progressive lenses and reading glasses for when I’m wearing contacts. 🙂
Jun 11, 2013 @ 13:51:09
A very strong image created in so few lines…well said IMHO.
Jun 11, 2013 @ 14:39:16
Thank you! I always look forward to your insight.
Jun 11, 2013 @ 19:13:43
Like a lot. (but not ‘vestiges’ – nasty sound and a little plonky purple in the style of the rest of the language here, and anyway is not ‘vestiges’ synonym for ‘remains’? In which case it messes with the logic. In fact, miss out the line completely, maybe….)
Jun 11, 2013 @ 20:45:06
🙂 it means a tiny amount too – but not exactly how I meant it lol… so its sliced.